Philadelphia Will Do

May 22, 2008

Today on DrugRoar.com

Yes, I'm still blogging daily about drugs over at Drug Roar. Today I even did a few whole posts! One was about New Jersey's medical marijuana bill and another was a Redlasso (fight the man!) clip of a surprisingly long (and well done, to boot) report about low dose naltrexone and its possibility in treating a variety of diseases, including Chron's and Parkinson's.

Posted by D-Mac at 01:12 PM | Comments (0)
Archives: Meta, PW, Shameless Self-Promotion

Police Chat On 6 ABC

Action News is having its first online chat with the police department brass since the fallout from the firing of four police officers involved in the kicking and such of shooting suspects. The over-under on the number of questions submitted that boil down to "Why aren't the police allowed to just beat up suspects?" is roughly 72.

I have no doubt this will be extremely interesting, though not as interesting as a chat with the guys who post on Domelights.

Posted by D-Mac at 12:33 PM | Comments (0)
Archives: 6 ABC, Philly PD

Shocker: Voters Are Stupid

Dick Polman has a blog post today that is absolutely hilarious and you must read it. Apparently, some dude did a focus group with 12 voters who didn't follow politics much and wondered why the primary wasn't over yet.

And, of course, they all think Obama is a Muslim, even though his Christian pastor's comments about how America throws a ton of black people in prison for fun were all over the news a month or so ago. Let's just quote the best parts:

For instance, here's Dorita, opining about Obama: "I'm a little concerned. I don't know enough about his Muslim background and their beliefs and how he views everything. I'm a little concerned. I need to check his background."

Here's Josh on Obama: "He's representing a minority in more than one case. He is African American and he is Muslim. And in light of that...it does feel like we're being judged or pounded down on because we want to carry a gun or we want to wear the American flag pin."

Here's Melinda, clearly the GOP's dream voter: "I just really feel like he's...not a people pleaser as in the Americans, but the other people who don't necessarily need to be pleased, the other, the enemies if you will, I don't know. I'm just not real positive on that."

The comments then explode with people who love to read blogs they hate (for reasons I can't understand, but whatever) attacking Polman for making fun of people who think Obama is a Muslim.

But, uh, this isn't really surprising. Let's generalize for a moment: Most people don't really seem to care much about the truth; they care more about what they want to believe. If you want to believe Barack Obama is a Muslim, then you can probably find evidence that Obama is an evil Muslim who's going to destroy America -- whether it's in a chain email or a Daniel Pipes column.

And if you need any evidence that people are stupid, then there are nearly 8,000 posts on this website that seem to confirm that. And then there's me, who has written nearly a billion words on this stupidity, sometimes coming off rather stupid myself. In a word: Duh.

Equal time for the willfully ignorant [American Debate]

Posted by D-Mac at 12:17 PM | Comments (4)
Archives: 2008 Presidential Race, Barack Obama, Dick Polman, Islam, Stupidity, Truth

Main Liner Shockingly Annoyed

Today's question for Salon advice columnist Cary Tennis comes from some snooty rich person on the Main Line (I guess), and is as follows: My neighbor's son is playing basketball from 3:30 p.m. to 7 p.m., and I can't stand the bouncing. Also, I will point out that he sucks at hoops.

Gawd, how bad is it that a kid wants to get out and get some exercise and attempt to better himself at something he clearly enjoys doing! The nerve of that stupid little punk.

The real question is, of course: How close could houses in a "lawned and leafy, neo-bucolic suburb of Philadelphia" be? And how loud could a basketball being dribbled be, especially when it's at 3:30 in the afternoon? And how could you live that close to Narberth and be annoyed by basketball?

Anyway, if you're an adult with a kid who loves basketball and plays a lot, I suggest you start teaching him some new skills: Like shotput throwing, drumming or possibly screaming contests.

He dribbles! He shoots! He drives me insane! [Salon]
Thanks, Emily G.

Posted by D-Mac at 11:30 AM | Comments (2)
Archives: Advice Columnists, Annoyances, Basketball, Main Line, WTF

It's Apparently Legal To Be Offensive

Hey, the city's Human Rights Commission had been investigating those stupid Family Guy-quoting white power posters, probably made by people who didn't realize the line from Family Guy was a parody.

Anyway, the HRC did some looking into it and found -- in a shocker -- speech is apparently legal in this country. Oh, and if you see somebody putting up stupid fliers, you're apparently not supposed to confront them.

Nick Taliaferro, the Commission's executive director, says if someone is posting or passing out offensive material, call police if need be, but usually don't start a confrontation yourself: "But if you just see them on the street, the best thing to do, most times, is to go to an agency that has an organized instruction manner of confronting them and dealing with them and addressing them and then to talk to people who share your concerns and to find ways to positively counter-act what you're seeing in their literature."

Yes, call police if need be if you see someone passing out offensive material. How dare someone do something offensive here in America. And after you call the cops, be sure to go to the appropriate agency to report your offense.

HR Commission Says Race-Baiting Flyers Were Legal
Tuesday: Speech Police Investigate Posters
May 12: Family Guy-Quoting Racists!

Posted by D-Mac at 10:52 AM | Comments (0)
Archives: Free Speech, Human Rights Commission, Legality, Offensiveness, Speech Police

Cataldi's Predictions As Right As Ever

Remember during football season, when Angelo Cataldi was all "A.J. Feeley is a better quarterback than Donovan McNabb" in his Metro column? It was so stupid I didn't even blog about it. Well, it turns out Cataldi's predictions aren't just bunk for football.

From his Kerri-Lee TV American Idol blog, posted a few hours before last night's show:

I really don’t need to see the final show to know who has won. How it came about during the intense last round of competition was fascinating, though. By all appearances, David Cook tanked the final night. He handed the title to David Archuleta[.]

As you may have heard somewhere possibly maybe, David Cook won American Idol in a rout.

Posted by D-Mac at 10:17 AM | Comments (1)
Archives: American Idol, Angelo Cataldi, Predictions

Broad Street To Be Closed For 8 Days

Know what would make this whole Convention Center expansion even better than knocking down some old buildings? Right: Closing off Broad Street for eight days. Duh, why didn't we think of this before?

Starting tomorrow at 5 a.m., Broad will be closed off from JFK Boulevard to Race Street northbound and from Race Street to Arch Street southbound. SEPTA's buses will have a bunch of detours (see the map from KYW 1060 at right).

The closing is taking place because of the demolishing of a building at Broad and Cherry streets; the Convention Center expansion project director says: "It's kind of an extraordinary circumstance. And the measures taken for public safety reasons are also extraordinary." Oh, well it's all okay if it's an extraordinary situation, then. I thought it was more inconvenient, but now I understand.

Convention Center Work Will Close North Broad St. for Eight Days [KYW 1060]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:29 AM | Comments (1)
Archives: Broad Street, Convention Center, Extraordinary Situations

Abridged Daily News Columnists

Stu Bykofsky: Today, Stu quotes an old Chris Rock bit about how not to get beat up by police. Then he adds some of his own riffs! Oh, boy.

Ronnie Polaneczky: Yes, yes, people like animals more than they like humans. We all know this. Anyway, some state senator is really insensitive either way.

Michael Smerconish: Oh, noes, hockey is too violent, says Smerconish! Nevermind that hockey is way less violent now than it was, say, 35 years ago.

Posted by D-Mac at 08:47 AM | Comments (0)
Archives: Daily News, Michael Smerconish, Ronnie Polaneczky, Stu Bykofsky

Ryan Howard's Long Bomb

Ryan Howard hit a pair of homers last night as the Phillies cruised to a 12-2 win over the Nationals. Yes, the Fightins could have used some of those runs in the first two games of the series -- when they scored only 1 -- but, hey, what are you going to do?

Above, Howard's first homer, an absolute bomb to right-center field. It was the first homer to go into the upper deck at Washington's new baseball park (aka the video game stadium). Hit Tracker says the homer went 441 feet.

Posted by D-Mac at 08:31 AM | Comments (0)
Archives: Home Runs, Phillies, Ryan Howard

May 21, 2008

People Continuing To Be Too Serious

Every week, Johnny Goodtimes posts a question of the week on his website; he then asks it at all of his quizzos that week. It's a way to get people to go to his website and remember about quizzo (or something like that).

Anyway, this week somebody edited the Wikipedia entry for the question of the week's subject (Mark Linn-Baker, for some reason) in an attempt to have people look up the wrong answer.

Now that's fairly clever. And also fairly pathetic, but some people really, really, really take quizzo seriously.

Quizzo Sabotage!!! [JGT]

Posted by D-Mac at 03:41 PM | Comments (2)
Archives: Quizzo, Sabotage, Wikipedia

More Random Phillies Notes

Thought Tom Gordon pitching in 45 different stadiums was impressive? Puh-leeze. Rob Iracane provides us with an update about two more Phillies pitchers who have pitched in 45+ ballparks.

Jamie Moyer makes it 46 tonight when he starts against the Washington Nationals in DC, and Rudy Seanez has pitched in 46 different stadiums already -- and will reach 47 if he comes in tonight. Yes, the Phillies pitchers are really, really old.

Elsewhere, Patrick Berkery shares his favorite Phillies fan taunt ever (which he originally wrote for a piece in PW).

Posted by D-Mac at 02:24 PM | Comments (0)
Archives: Phillies

Your Weekly RPS Post

I believe I have found my calling in life, and it is rock paper scissors. Not because I'm particularly good at it -- I lost in the first round twice again this week, putting me on something like a 10-event streak of losing in Round 1 -- but because it is a sport (or whatever) that involves ingesting alcohol and is a sport you can be ranked in the top-10 in despite not having won a match since opening night.

I've mentioned all of that before, but it bears repeating due to the events of last night at Dirty Frank's. Last night was one of my more dramatic failures in recent memory. I managed to win the first round on my opponents' four fouls and had match point twice -- once in the second set, and again in the third. Despite this, I managed to lose the match. And, yes, despite how absolutely pathetic I am in competitive RPS -- Gossip Girlfriend, who has played at three events, has more wins than I do -- I will continue to attend matches and probably continue to lose.

Over two years of play in the RPS city league, my record is something like 7-25. And yet I finished in the top 8 last year thanks to two wins in the City League Championships. And, currently, I am in first in the Street RPS competition after winning it last night. Nevermind that I'm only up by a dollar and have virtually no shot of winning the total competition: For now, this loser is in first. What a great game.

Philadelphia Will Do sponsors the timeouts of the Philadelphia Rock Paper Scissors City League. Events at Mondays at the Khyber (except for next week), Tuesdays at Dirty Frank's, Wednesdays at Skinner's (next week) and Thursdays at The Dive. All events "start" at 9:30 p.m.

Posted by D-Mac at 02:05 PM | Comments (1)
Archives: Promotional Ventures, RPS, RPS City League, Rock Paper Scissors

TV Networks Threaten Redlasso

Once again, a superbly awesome thing on the Internet has been ruined by giant corporations. While Redlasso has more bugs than [insert awesome joke here], it still indexes live television and allows things like my Final Jeopardy blog.

And, now, naturally, Redlasso is being threatened by NBC, Fox and CBS. Much like when YouTube started removing sports videos when the NFL complained, our fun has been ruined.

At least they waited until after the season finale of Gossip Girl, though.

Posted by D-Mac at 01:16 PM | Comments (0)
Archives: Redlasso

Eagles' Draft Pick Can Fly

Les Bowen has an incredibly detailed profile of Eagles second-round draft pick DeSean Jackson in today's Daily News. The article includes the above photo, which is apparently real and not a Photoshop. Guh-wha?

The best part of the profile, as noted by Iggles Blog, is Jackson's father.

"His coach at Cal said we were too involved in his life,'' said Bill Jackson, 63, who is retired from FedEx. Moments earlier, he had concluded a phone conversation with DeSean in Philadelphia... "I ask coach Tedford, 'Why not be involved with your children?'... I've heard Andy Reid doesn't want me anywhere near his facility. I'm like, 'Damn, what did I do?' ''

It's a weird age we're living in when parents have to be barred from sports practices. It's even weirder when these kids are professional athletes.

Eagles - Eagles draft pick DeSean Jackson sets record straight [Daily News]

Posted by D-Mac at 12:32 PM | Comments (0)
Archives: DeSean Jackson, Eagles, Funny Photos

PHL Airport #1, PHL Airline Last

Yeah. So the Philadelphia International Airport was named number one in customer satisfaction. Yes, the horrible PHL airport, the one everyone complains about and hates, was rated the #1 airport in the country. If you ever need to know that surveys are stupid, you now have concrete evidence.

But, wait! says airport chief Charles Isdell: "We have been trying for several years now to turn the corner in terms of people's perception of the airport. And a lot of their perception quite frankly has to do with the performance of US Airways. The performance of US Airways has gone up in the past year."

Uh, this is a consumer perception survey from J.D. Power. If people's perception is that the airport service sucks -- I've never actually had a bad experience there, but I never fly anywhere -- how, exactly, did the airport win this contest?

In related news, the University of Michigan ranked U.S. Airways the worst airline in America, based on consumer surveys. Argh, how the hell does all of this work again?

PHL Airport Gets #1 Ranking in Satisfaction Survey [KYW 1060]
Travelers pan service at U.S. Airways [Bizjournals.com]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:41 AM | Comments (3)
Archives: Confusion, Customer Surveys, PHL Airport, Pointlessness, Surveys, WTF

Levittown Priest Sends Awesome Letter

The annual St. Mike's Fair in Levittown -- which has been running since my dad was a student at the school, I think -- wanted to have fireworks this year, but Tullytown¹ police say no go.

Why? Well, the Tullytown police chief was inconvenienced the last time they had fireworks, in 1995. "I was stuck with my patrol car on Levittown Parkway for three hours," Police Chief Pat Priore actually told the newspaper.

St. Mike's pastor Michael DiIorio isn't happy with the decision. And he sent Tullytown an awesome/hilarious letter!

DiIorio said he didn't believe the fireworks would draw 30,000 people. He called the number “arbitrary and grossly exaggerated.”
“Presently there are approximately 32,000 people in Levittown. I firmly doubt that every man, woman and child will attend the St. Michael's Fair on one evening,” he wrote.

Tullytown has its own fireworks display every September. “If our fireworks are "unsafe' then so are those of the borough,” DiIorio wrote. “Therefore, September fireworks for the borough should be cancelled at once.”

Ha ha, because he can't have his fireworks he doesn't want anyone to have them. Also, the annual Tullytown fireworks show is invitation only. Jerks!

¹ Levittown is only a post office and a census-designated place; the area that is Levittown actually spreads over five different townships/boroughs/whatever in Bucks County. When I was an intern at the Bucks County Courier Times, my bosses were very insistent that we never refer to anyone as "from Levittown," as they were actually from Bristol Borough or whatever.

St. Mike's Fair fireworks deemed 'too dangerous' [Bucks County Courier Times]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:16 AM | Comments (4)
Archives: Carnivals, Catholicism, Fireworks, Hilarity, Letters, Levittown, Priests